on a rainy day,
sorrow drips into your heart
through a pinhole
just like a faucet that leaks
and there is comfort in the sound
but while you debate
half empty or half full
it slowly rises
your love is gonna drown
--marching bands of manhattan, death cab for cutie
how beautiful. down with songs with thrashy lyrics which try to hard to rhyme.
i've finally understood what it takes for someone to say 'i'm a ghost'. i understand fully.
Sunday, May 21, 2006
one month into summer break.
and about three months to go. oh god it's passing too fast.. tooo fast. i have this habit of, keeping track of how much time has gone by. let's say i'm on a three day trip. at the end of the first day i'd think to myself, "oh man 1/3 of it holiday is gone alr" or if i'm halfway thru, "oh so far i've done that, now i'm only left with the other half of that." ok i know, it's weird. but i can't help doing it. i wonder if it's normal behavior or whather it's just me.
it's taken me a whole AY at school to fully immerse myself in uni life. and i must say i'm enjoying it a lot more now that i'm more active in other school activities. which in my case is quite a paradox because i'm so like oh fuck it less things i'm involved with the better cos that means less responsibilities. perhaps it's all the people i'm meeting and getting to know better, or perhaps it's that so called "school spirit" thing, i don't know. nevertheless, i am much happier in school now. to think that i could finally blurt a semblance of '"i love smu".
need to book driving, get a haircut and eat at marmalade pantry. this can only mean one thing haha. jasssssssssss?
posted by chloe @ 7:00 PM
Saturday, May 20, 2006
"if you have a father, or if you haven't one"
i have called you children
i have called you son
what is there to answer
if i'm the only one
morning comes in Paradise
morning comes in light
still i must obey
still i must invite
if there's anything say
if there's anything to do
if there's any other way
i'll do anything for you
i was dressed embarassment
i was dressed in wine
if you had a part of me
will you take your time
even if i come back
even if i die
is there some idea
to replace my life
like a father to impress
like a mother's morning dress
if we ever make a mess
i'll do anything for you
i have called you preacher
i have called you son
if you have a father
or if you haven't one
i'll do anything for you
i did everything for you
--for the widows in paradise, for the fatherless in ypsilanti, sufjan stevens
posted by chloe @ 1:15 PM
Friday, May 19, 2006
hands down.
it's really amazing, the things i discover about myself as time goes by.
on another matter altogether, this year was the first time i sat down and watched SOV as a member of the audience since 2002. at the end of it, we went onstage as part of the alumni to sing 'no man is an island'. a song that holds much meaning and many memories for all of us. but this time, i felt practically nothing going thru me as i sang the anthem. no more emotional chokes here and there, no more vivid memories running thru the mind.
i guess this signifies that i have finally come to realise that i'm at a stage where choir can no longer be my life like it used to be back in vj. and it's the sad realization that for now, it can at most be a passionate hobby on the side in the form of vc. and it's sad, because i know someday this passion will slowly die out due to other commitments and responsiblities. for this i really respect the more senior members of my alumni that have stuck with the choir for years on end. because i see now, the amount of dedication and passion it takes for one to continuously commit saturdays to slogging in a stuffy room in siglap.
to strike a balance amongst things in future will be so challenging. i can already feel it now when consequences are only so light in comparison to what they will be next time.
why the hell do people wanna grow up huh? i'm finding it to be a real test of my character and strength.
forever and ever.
it's means so much to only the two of us
and the two of us it shall be-
the two of us.
posted by chloe @ 1:22 AM
Sunday, May 14, 2006
2 weeks.
oh no i didn't die in KL, just been really busy.
if you believed that line you so don't know me well enough. obviously the real reason is that i'm too lazy to update this thing. and feedback from the older generation (aka yinchuin heehee) has deemed my blog impractical and difficult to read. i bet the blog portion turns out small cos you're not on 1024x768. everyone should be on 1024x768 it's such a wonderful resolution to be onnnn. sorry la next one will be more reader friendly ok. but no time to work on it now. omg this layout has been here for a year.. so much for changing every two months haa.
so in the last two weeks, i:
-shopped till i dropped in KL
-turned twenty
-stuffed myself for about 8 days consecutively thanks to KL and birthday dinners
-met a weirdass french chef at work
-met a strange lady on the bus who gave me, weird cds
-received a compliment from someone on being a 'beautiful singaporean'. which i guess is pretty rare now. (no don't be a dumbass not in the physical sense.)
-obtained my very satisfactory result slip online :)
-have been spending quite some time in our new radio studio. damn coool. gonna be a deejayyy :)
-have been quite an edgy person
and i'm up for a harrowing shitass busy week come monday. did someone say holidays?
my faith in you
can only determine my fate
and not yours.
posted by chloe @ 2:55 PM
Monday, May 01, 2006
bye.
a new division of mankind has evolved. bustards. people who just don't know how to behave on public buses. let me list you a few examples:
-punching the aircon vent thing so all that's left is a hole for cold air to continuously beat against you.
-talking as if everyone's deaf and like your grandfather owns the bus.
-blasting whatever fucking song that's on the boombox (or since we're more modern now, handphone) thinking that the whole damn bus wants to hear it.
cannot survive without plugging into my iPod on any bus journey. keeps me oblivious to such stupid episodes.
ok i'm off to KL. not going anywhere fancy so i can't go au revoir, sayonara, auf wiedersehen or anything. so, seeya.
--
and they say
she's so lucky
she's a star
but she cry cry cries in her lonely heart thinking:
"if there's nothign missing in my life
then why do these tears come at night?"
oh pls definitely not a britney fan. but, how apt.
posted by chloe @ 9:47 AM
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